Growing up I never knew I was culturing and practicing an unhealthy habit called worry. My thoughts always revolved around my brain since I was a little girl and that was normal for me. I would read Matthew 6:25 and think, I have food; I have clothes; I’m good! Plus, I have a bright and bubbly personality, so surely I was the least likely to struggle with my thoughts and emotions. However, any unrenewed mind is susceptible to the way of the world; a way filled with anxiety, stress, and overburden. By the time I had children, I felt as though a weight like a cat was laying on my chest. In my mid twenties I realized I was struggling with general anxiety.
In the Bible, God promises a life in Christ filled with spiritual riches like joy, peace, and satisfaction. Yet oftentimes, Christians find themselves in the space between the promise and fulfillment. This space between can be described as a wilderness experience. In the darkness of the wilderness, it seems as though God is distant and life can be very difficult. However, the moment we accept faith to believe God has saved us, the Holy Spirit comes and dwells in us. God is always present, protecting, guiding, and loving us.
Leading us through the wilderness is an act of divine love and grace. It is in the wilderness where God trains us into unbroken fellowship with Him. It is in the wilderness where God purifies our faith. It is where He deals with our sin so we can walk victoriously above the flesh.
My natural way was that of fear and anxiety, but in the wilderness the Lord drew me out of the world and wooed me back into a loving relationship with Him. I knew anxiety wasn’t from Him, but the result of sin in my flesh. I believed a life filled with anxiousness wasn’t what God intended for me. I chose to believe that God is good, and wants good things for me. I chose to believe He was allowing me to struggle for my good, and that the struggle was there for a purpose.
Hebrews 12:4-11 says God is treating us as His children, and as His children He disciplines us. Let’s read this passage in The Message version:
"In this all-out match against sin, others have suffered far worse than you, to say nothing of what Jesus went through—all that bloodshed! So don’t feel sorry for yourselves. Or have you forgotten how good parents treat children, and that God regards you as his children?
'My dear child, don’t shrug off God’s discipline,
but don’t be crushed by it either.
It’s the child he loves that he disciplines;
the child he embraces, he also corrects.'
God is educating you; that’s why you must never drop out. He’s treating you as dear children. This trouble you’re in isn’t punishment; it’s training, the normal experience of children. Only irresponsible parents leave children to fend for themselves. Would you prefer an irresponsible God? We respect our own parents for training and not spoiling us, so why not embrace God’s training so we can truly live? While we were children, our parents did what seemed best to them. But God is doing what is best for us, training us to live God’s holy best. At the time, discipline isn’t much fun. It always feels like it’s going against the grain. Later, of course, it pays off handsomely, for it’s the well-trained who find themselves mature in their relationship with God."
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